10 Ways We Turn Off Women Without Knowing It

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Listen – every man has probably at some point in their life, stumbled upon a ‘top 10 list of things that turn women off’ – usually in a magazine, blog post, or buzzfeed article.

And those are fun… but if you want to REALLY know what makes women lose interest in men…. you have to go to Reddit. 

And as fate would have it, the other day while browsing r/AskWomen (as I do most Sunday mornings) I stumbled across a thread titled “Ladies, what made you lose interest in your crush and why?” 

What I discovered was fascinating… revolutionary even.  And I knew at that moment that I had to share it with you guys. 

So without further adieu, here are the top 10 things that make women lose interest in men, according to Reddit! 

Let’s start from the bottom and work our way to #1. 

Lo que descubrí fue fascinante… incluso revolucionario. Y supe en ese momento que tenía que compartirlo con ustedes.

Entonces, sin más preámbulos, ¡Aquí están las 10 cosas principales que hacen que las mujeres pierdan interés en los hombres, según Reddit!

Comencemos desde abajo y avancemos hasta el n. ° 1.

10. Instagram is a Red Flag

Among all of the social platforms, Instagram is unique in that we tend to follow accounts that are consistent with the themes that most interest us – whether that be memes, philosophers, UFC fighters… or bubble butts. 

Spanish philosopher Jose Ortega Gasset once famously remarked “Tell me what you pay attention to and I’ll tell you who you are”, and so when a guy’s Instagram is loaded with models and Onlyfans girls, it’s a pretty good indication that his interests are skewed more toward ‘sexual’ and less towards ‘intellectual’’ -which is a  MAJOR red flag for a quality woman. 

Now you have to be careful here because the solution isn’t simply to not follow these accounts… because that doesn’t solve the root problem. 

As Carl Jung points out “What you deny you submit. What you accept transforms you.”

Accept that you’re sexually attracted to these sorts of things – we all are –  understand the positive and negative implications of all of this, and then use this information to CHOOSE the accounts you WANT to follow.

9. Poor Hygiene & Messy

There’s nothing more repulsive to a woman than poor hygiene – smelly breath, stinky armpits… and if you combine that with a messy car or dirty room… 

In the case of hygiene, most guys who suffer from bad hygiene, do so because they’re unaware of it. 

However, every morning and sometimes in the afternoon especially if you’ve sweat in any way – invest in a good underarm deodorant, ideally a magnesium deodorant which is long-lasting and chemical free – brush your teeth 2-3x a day, paying special attention to your tongue – invest in a high quality cologne, and change your shirt every day, jeans once every 1 or 2 days. 

As for your environment, just remember that messy out here usually means messy up here.

8. Too Into Sports

So there are three really interesting elements at play here. 

The first is that in general, women are less into sports than men – the studies that show this generally highlight gender differences from an evolutionary biology perspective. 

The second, and this should be obvious, has to do with common interests. If one person in the relationship has an ‘extreme’ interest in something that the other person has absolutely no interest in, or worse, an aversion to, then of course that can lead to compatibility issues. 

But the third, and perhaps most interesting element, is that most guys who are overly into sports, tend to be complete losers.   

Someone whose life and general mood revolve around something external and completely uncontrollable (as is the case with any sports team) – probably doesn’t have much going on in their own life.

7. Idolizes Other Men

The first is that women want a man, not a child.

Generally speaking, a ‘manchild’ is someone who is unreliable, reacts poorly to criticism, behaves like a frat boy, always gives excuses instead of owning up to mistakes, unorganized, constant financial problems, etc etc.

So if you possess some or all of these qualities, AND you worship a man to the extent that you outsource all of your beliefs and thoughts to them… well you can understand how this can be perceived by women as unattractive, childish behavior. 

On the other hand, if you have strong models, male or female, who positively influence you without directly substituting your own evolving thought processes and philosophical positions… from what I can tell that’s not only fine, it’s healthy and attractive.

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6. Negging

So this is among the more infamous pick-up techniques – and while I can’t deny that it does work, it’s a pathetic strategy normally employed by low quality men.

The term “Negging” was coined by Erik von Markovik, a controversial seduction guru very similar to the character Tom Cruise played in the 1999 film “Magnolia.”

Erik defined ”Negging” as “a negative comment, made with subtlety, that lowers the guard of a target and leads them to question their own value, thus increasing your relative value”

In other words, it’s when you subtly disqualify the other person while making it seem like you’re praising them. Examples include: 

“Nice nails. Are they real? No? Oh, they look nice anyway.’”

“I don’t normally date chubby girls, but you carry it well.” 

And my favorite:

“All your guy friends are only friends with you because want to have sex with you. Not me though, not that you’re unattractive, it’s just that I’m not that into you.”

If you’re after a quality girl, instead of trying to lower their quality, I’ve found it to be a much better investment of time to focus on increasing your own quality.

5. Bad Eating Habits

Imagine taking a shit directly in front of a woman you’re on a date with.

Now while I won’t say that it’s the same thing as chewing with your mouth open, I will say that they’re both things that nobody wants to see.

Both sexes have what’s called ‘proper etiquette’ – which for men and women include chewing with your mouth closed – bonus points for not holding your fork like a 3 year old, and knowing to place a napkin on your lap at fancier restaurants. 


4. Poor Grammar

In a 2016 Match.com of over 5,500 single Americans – 39% indicated that ‘grammar’ was even more important than how their crush smiled or dressed!

In a more recent survey, the dating site ‘Zoosk’ found that ⅔ of women would not date a guy with poor grammar!

Not only does it directly correlate with low intelligence – but from my experience – a guy who hasn’t made the effort to learn how to distinguish between their, there, and they’re – is unlikely to make the effort to improve in other areas. 

3. Bad Kisser

According to Susan Hughes, a psychologist from Albright College in Pennsylvania, ““Women tend to use kissing to create a bond with their partners and to assess them as potential mates… meanwhile, men use kissing as a means to an end”… that end being sex of course.

In a study that Hughes conducted which included 1000 males and females, women overwhelmingly indicated that a ‘bad-kiss’ was a deal breaker, whereas for men, it wasn’t.

Additionally the study observed that men liked significantly wetter kisses, which psychologists hypothesize is because males  “perceive a greater wetness or salivary exchange during a kissing as an index of the female’s sexual arousal/receptivity, similar to the act of sexual intercourse.”

In summary, when it comes to kissing, rather than going in on a woman like one of those sandworms from Dune, try to treat it like a dance.

If she’s kissing slowly, kiss slowly. If she’s trying to pick food out of your stomach with her tongue, then yeah you can be more aggressive.

2. Hot & Cold

So this is actually one of those things that both sexes struggle a bit with understanding, and it’s actually really simple.

If a guy is hot & cold with a girl, he’s just not that into her. He’s probably ‘hot’ when he’s horny, lonely, or bored – and he becomes cold again shortly after he’s satisfied whatever need he was looking to fulfill with the woman.

And guys, if you’re being hot & cold with a girl, you’re not into her… so grow up.

1. Being Boring

So this was the the #1 reason that women lost interest in their crush, and rather on focusing on why this happens (which I’d probably need an entire video to explain) let’s just focus on the solution, which is actually pretty simple.

BE an interesting guy.

Take risks… MASSIVE risks. Constantly expose yourself to uncomfortable situations that force you to grow. Build a successful business or strive to reach a high level in your chosen profession. Commit to the development of a particular skill or skills, and aim to reach the highest levels. Travel deep inside yourself to discover hidden truths.


Alright guys – this was a really fun article for me – if you guys enjoyed it and you can how hard we’re working on these videos – please take just a few seconds to give the video a like, it really helps the channel a lot.

Also, in the comments below, let me know which one of these 10 turn-offs that you’ve been guilty of. . I promise that the more honest you are, the bigger your smile will be when you click the comment button.

If you guys want more insights into my personal life, I’m a pretty open guy – make sure to follow me on Instagram @nelsonquest – AND head over to nelsonquest.com to grab my ‘Dark Mode’ productivity system and sign up for my newsletter, which we’re now putting out once a week and getting a huge positive response from.

And last but not least, don’t just subscribe, but make sure to click the damn notification bell if you want to be notified FIRST when I release new videos, unless of course, you are a boring, dirty, uneducated, sports-fiend Instagram addict…

In which case… you should actually subscribe and click the notification bell.

This is the path.

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